classical music, pianos, and mirrors

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warning: this post will be very scattered. three totally different sections.

sometimes i like classical music. right now i'm listening to it for class, and i probobly wouldn't be apart from that. but there is something different about this music that you don't hear elsewhere. it can... i dunno, carry you somewhere else when you listen to it. not that other music can't do that. i'm saying, you turn this on, and the first time, no memories attached, it can put you somewhere. i'm probobly not explaining this well, but if you understand, you probobly already knew what i meant before i started. it can be very enjoyable.

i want to buy a good keyboard. i love playing the piano, and to have a decent sounding one... maybe it wouldn't be good because i might play it too much. there are many cool music related things that i want right now, and they are all very expensive. that is not cool. like a new acoustic, a really good one that is respectable. and a bunch of recording equipment and a computer that could handle good music programs that would let me make cool loops. i would really really like to experiment with more electronic music, as i have been loving bands like the postal service and dvid crowder's sunsets and sushi cd. i might totally suck at it, but i don't care. i would like to try. i've recently been re-inspired to try new things musically. and to write in new ways.

today i was convicted very hard. about my relationship with Christ. i realized something about that verse in the new testament in james 1, about looking in the mirror and forgetting what you look like. it is very easy to look in the mirror and forget what you look like when you don't like what you see. it's more confortable that way. i guess its the same concept as people who repress feelings they don't like, or repress memories that will cause them discomfort. it is very hard too look at yourself in the spiritual mirror. partly because deep down you know exactly what you're going to see. partly because you have absolutely not desire to see it again and again and again. i have to make myself look! it is so stinkin important and so hard. you just have to get over yourself and take a good look. and remember once you walk away. i am learning this the hard way.

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